Sunday, March 8, 2009

I am finding that finding another church home is become really hard.

I have attended my church off and on for 13 years. My children have just about never missed a Wednesday with this church. I can remember the first time I was invited to this church, the first Sunday school class that I attended and absolutely did not fit into. I was 19 and a single mother of two children and in a collage and career class. I wasn’t in collage or making a career. Most women in the single women’s class did not have children and I wasn’t married so I did quit going to Sunday school. But I loved that church. They basically helped me raise my children, help send them in the right direction with the Lord. I was soon saved and Baptized into the church. I was so excited. I really felt like a new person and in the right path. I had so much support from Marian, Mr. Rick and Steve Hammond. The church offered camp for my kids and being single mom did not leave me with much money but Mr. Rick and Steve always made it happen. There are so many people in that church that help make my family what it is today. Although I did grow in that church I always felt like something was missing, not sure what but something wasn’t just right. About 3 or 4 years ago I had a member of the church walk up to me and ask had I filled out a visitor’s card. I was hurt and angry. Not angry at the member but at myself. I had not been involved in this church enough for this person to know that I was there. That woke me up. But I just could not find my place in the church. I could not find where I belonged. I did go visit another church and fell in love. I fit in so right and quickly ran into something I had never thought about. My children were attached to PVBC. I did not have the heart to rip them from the only church they had ever known nor were they willing to leave. I felt so selfish. I soon returned to PVBC. But that feeling of needing to do something never left my heart.

So at the beginning of the year our family decided to go visiting other churches. I want to serve the Lord and I know there is something I can be doing to serve Him better. Our quest is to find a church that fits us all. And that does seem to be challenge. I love praise and worship music. I love Bro. Glenn. Ok I know there is only one place to find him. I want to volunteer in the church and participate in church activities. I want the church to be close to my home so that we can do that. I don’t want to compete to fit in. I want to be known for who I am. I want a great youth program that my kids can participate in. So off we go.

Church number one: None will be named. The music was good. What song to the Lord isn’t? The preacher touched my heart. It was small. Only 38 attended that Sunday. Not much of a youth group. It is super close to my house. (Bro. Glenn was not there). I know someone that goes there.

Church number two: The music was awesome. I could have stayed all day for that. It was a big church. 527 attended Sunday school a few Sunday’s ago. Almost felt lost. (Bro. Glenn was not there). It is super close to the house. Has a huge youth group. Good for a second visit.

I am finding it hard to find a church that all will be happy with. We still have more to visit. I am having a hard time “replacing” (lack of a better term) Bro. Glenn. I wish I could scoop him up and take him with me. I have felt like he has preached right to my heart every time he opens his mouth. I understand and hold on to each end every word he preaches. One of my children totally misses PVBC. That again is tugging at my heart. I just fill like I have so much to give. I feel a little homeless right now.


tsmales said...

I know what you mean! When I moved back to Anderson I thought I should go to PVBC because all of ya'll went there. Glenn was so great when Granny and Papa were sick he came to visit so much that I grew to love him too. Even my pastor (cousin Tim) was not there to hold my hand and pray with my and cry with me like Glenn was. Then I started to work with Terri and grew to love her too! But when I went to chuch I did not feel like I belonged. It took several years for me to go back to church. When I first visited Covenant I knew it was where I belong, We have missed 3 Sundays in the past year, 2 boat shows and 1 vacation. I look so forward to Sunday now and Richard loves it too. I hope you find one soon!
I am so proud of you and what you have become. My pastor has been talking about what happens when we die the last few weeks and about people in heaven now. One of the questions was can people in heaven see what is going on in the world now. If granny and papa can see you now I know they are proud too.

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