Ok people I am sucking at my diet. I have currently completely quit exercising. I know, I’m bad. I have some ideas to get me back on track. I have had a hard month mentally and I just haven’t felt like getting up and going. I do see a light at the end of the tunnel for my stress. I was sitting in the bath tub (TMI) the other night soaking in self pity and water, trying to wash away all my worries when it hit me like a ton of bricks. My loved saying “you can’t control everyone’s actions but you can control your reaction and how those actions affect your life”. So true and so hard to live by. But I am going to try. I really need to focus on myself more. So to get back on track this is my goal and reward schedule. I have some empty ones, so give me some suggestions for some great rewards.

March 9 – 158 –New purse

March 16 – 156 -

March 23 – 154 – Get hair cut and color!!!

March 30- 152 -

April 6 – 150- Get my nails done

April 13 – 148 -

April 20 – 146 -

April 27 – 144 – New shoes

May 4 – 142 – Banana split ice cream

May 11 – 140 – Massage

May 18 – 138 -

May 25 – 136 -

June 1 – 134 – New bathing suit

new driveway

I accidentally drove my car into my ditch at my house when I got home today. To be honest – I thought it was the funniest thing ever. Scott on the other hand was not so much amused. All he could think about was where was I going to get the $500 to fix it from.

I just can’t quit laughing about it. I don’t even remember turning into the driveway – or rather beside the driveway. The next thing I new I was flooring it and back on the driveway I went. I busted my bumper. But really isn’t that what they are for – to bump with. I pulled into the car port and left my car running. I tried to go in the house but my foot got caught in the door and my shoe fell off. After I recovered from that I was going to lean on the counter and I hit a full glass of tea and it went flying. I look up and my family is looking at me as if I am on drugs. It was all an accident. Things happen. And this fits perfectly into my life right now.

Ok it’s true you can’t lose weight by eating what you want and staying on the couch, even if there is an Ace of cakes marathon on. I officially suck at dieting. But I have hope. I am really good at starting over again and again and again.

4 down 26 to go

4 down and 26 to go

I lost 2 lbs this week and boy has it been a week. The stress level is as high as it has ever been and does not seem to be easing up. Just when you think you can’t take anymore, the avalanche falls on you.

I want to say, “God you have my attention now. My world has been rocked.” I am spinning in circles, please help me stop. What is blocking me from seeing His guidance? I want to give up and let someone else take over. My heart is broke. Pray for me.

Well 2 down and 28 to go. One thing I know is my weight loves me. It never wants to leave. I’m pretty disappointed. I thought it would have been more.

This weekend was a challenge. I had a long road trip. I find it very hard to eat out health. Especially with all this temptations listed right there with the very few good for you things.

I never thought it but I do tend to eat because of my emotions. If I am stressed I think I DESERVE something sweet or unhealthy like a cheese burger. And for some really weird reason it makes me feel better.

I haven’t felt very good lately and have been battling the BFY (Bad For You) foods. I have to pull my way out of this and jump back on the wagon.

You know that saying – keep your friends close and keep your enemies closer- That’s not true. It should say – keep your friends close and pray for your enemies-

I love for my son to brush my hair. He is such a sweetie. (I know, random)

I did really good today. It was perfect.
Breakfast – egg beaters on an English muffin.
Lunch- subway
Dinner – Caribbean Jerk grilled chicken and mashed sweet potatoes

I exercised for 30 min on the elliptical. Once again it whooped my butt. I feel so good when I get off it. This weekend I am going to do some body measuring. This will give me a better idea of what I am losing. I will also be setting weekly goals and rewards for myself.

cookie monster

Cookies…… got to love them. I do love me a good soft gooey chocolate chip cookie. When you hear the word cookie it just makes you all warm inside. I have three cook books that are only about cookies. I do love a cookie.

Well I met the cookie monster today. Yes, there is someone out there that loves their cookie more then me. I found that out the hard way. I ate someone else’s cookie. I am completely innocent in the mater. I ask could I have a piece of the giant 6 foot (exaggerating) cookie and was told yes. I should have known. The devil was living in that cookie. Little did I know that one awesome bite of sin would turn out so wrong. The cookie monster came and scolded me for eating her cookie. I was supposed to know that she was misleading me when she said she would share. It was far too late. The cookie was gone. I was eating it as fast as I could while I was explaining that all I wanted was a piece of cookie. There I was sitting guilty with the chocolate icing all over my face. Dumbfounded!! What had I done wrong? It felt so right. And tasted so good. I had taken someone’s reward and cheated on my diet. I feel so ashamed. A true lesson was learned here.

Don’t say it is ok for someone to eat your cookie if you really don’t want them to. But look deep in your heart. If you have a really big cookie – it is ok to share. Sharing makes me feel good.


Needless to say I broke my diet. I ate a piece of cookie today but other wise I did good. I drank my water, had a sandwich for lunch and ravioli for supper.

I make a pledge today to stay away from other people’s food.